By Steve Moran
A few days ago we published an article titled “Should You Be Using Tinder for Market Research?” based on an interview I did with David Stewart the founder of the website Ageist. His research of the youngest of the “old” uncovered two hugely important truths that should scare you to death if you are committed to continuing to doing senior living the way we are doing it today, and should really excite you if you are looking for a path to the next generation of senior living.
Two Truths
The research shows two things:
- People our age are terrified of losing relevance
- People want to live a life that allows them to be the “best me” possible
It turns out that losing relevance is a lot scarier to people than even dying, and I get it. No one wants to be relegated to being one of those “cute” old people or even worse, one of those old people you have to endure because they are old.
Two Truths and Senior Living . . . It Depressed Me
During David’s keynote, after he talked about these two truths, I got my smartphone out and googled a couple of different versions of “senior living and best me”. Here is what I came up with:
ZERO, NADA, ZIP, ZILCH
None of that even in the marketing materials. We may use the words cruise ship living or luxury hotel living less but ultimately we are still operating a custodial and care kind of business. We are not really focused on helping residents live a “best me” life.
I am convinced that no matter how frail, physically and mentally, creating “best me” days is possible. We need to be doing it and talking about it.
What Would Senior Living Need to Look Like For You?
This is my favorite question to ask people who are not in our little industry niche, and yet asking it is kind of like hitting your thumb with a hammer. The answers are always some version of “I have no interest at all in living in a senior living community as it exists today.” David was no different.
He, like most of us, wants to live a life that is not segregated by age. A life that is not primarily focused on being old and loss of capacity. He wants to live in a place that has young and old; he wants to live in a place that allows him to make new friends, to create, to learn to grow.
He wants to live someplace that will inspire him and create opportunities for him to continue to contribute to the world.
He wants to live in the same kind of place you want to live in.
Here is the video of our entire interview:
# Response to Steve Moran
What a discouraging interview. Here I sit as a 75-year woman living in a CCRC for the past seven years, listening to two men talk about senior living as a place where older adults are warehoused and are irrelevant.
The key points you mention are the need to be relevant and to be the “best me.” If you want to be relevant and be the best you, move to a CCRC!
No wonder people say they don’t want to move to senior living with people that are “expert” talking as if all senior living options are the same. I think the “industry” is not doing their job by lumping all types of housing options under the label senior living. You mentioned Latitudes is touted as the type of senior living that is popular with a waiting list. Latitudes is a 55+ community with individual houses with a celebrity name. How is that any different than the newer 55+ communities that are all over the place. How relevant is life just partying and playing golf or pickleball?
It’s time that the “experts” become very clear on the differences between Independent living only settings, CCRCs, free-standing assisted living, free-standing memory care, and skilled nursing.
Managers of CCRCs need to realize that to feel relevant residents will want to have input into the decisions made about their lives. Engagement and transparency are key factors that make people feel relevant. We want a say in our lives and we want to know that our investment is safe.
I have been reading articles about what prospective residents want: wellness, dining choices, intellectual and cultural opportunities, engagement, and the list goes on. Surprise —many of the CCRCs I have been to or know about have what “the boomers” want right now.
A CCRC provides the opportunity to let the worries and hassle of homeownership be a thing of the past. The community setting provides a constant stream of new people to meet and become close supportive friends. When illness and disability come, if they do, the care and support will be available for me. We see couples now with one person in an independent living apartment while the other lives in memory care, assisted living, or in long-term care nursing. One resident participates in the life of the community while still being available to visit and support the more dependent spouse.
Both of you need to spend some time with a group of residents living their best life in a CCRC. My role models for aging were my parents, residents for 18 years in the community where I now live with my husband. They were 77 and 78 when they moved into the community. Both of them seized the opportunity to do things they did not do when they were younger. Both made friends that made their days more fulfilling. Both took leadership roles in clubs in the community. Both participated in multiple activities.
My husband and I are involved to the point of we both have to say “no” to new activities. Our days are full with poetry discussions, college classes on campus, leadership roles in the Catholic parish on campus, workouts with a trainer, movies and concerts, genealogy research, baking for neighbors, and making casseroles for the Catholic Charities daily hot food program in Baltimore. And that’s just my 86-year old husband.
I run the registered Apple User Group (159 names on the mailing list), serve as the state president for the Maryland Continuing Care Residents Association, and as a board member and editor for the National Continuing Care Residents Association. I also served as President of the Residents’ Council. I am a voracious reader loading up books on my Kindle from the library, manage to attend the movies and concerts held at the community, and attend water aerobics when I can fit it in.
As our mission statement says, “We share our gifts to create a community that celebrates life!” We do!