By Jack Cumming
As a teenager, I loved the line from Shakespeare’s Hamlet, “Frailty, thy name is woman” (Act 1, Scene 2). It fit both sisters and fickle girlfriends. Of course, it’s best read in context. That was then. Now I’m approaching 90, and I’m the one who’s frail.
Like Tumbleweed
This was brought home to me recently when I attended the LeadingAge California BOLD conference in Desert Springs, CA. I went to sit down on a chair, somehow missed, and tumbled backwards, smacking the back of my head on the floor. I felt fine, but I reached back to where my head had landed, and there was blood. Lesson: Humans are built to fall forward, not backward.
In case you’ve never had the experience, a wound on the skull bleeds profusely, which is probably a good thing. The result was much unwelcome attention and transportation to a nearby hospital. After this and that, a physician took a staple gun and slammed three staples into my head as though he were posting an ad on a telephone pole. In short, old age can really suck, and surprises are not always the fun kind. It was embarrassing.
My Bad
Truth to tell, I probably shouldn’t have been there with advanced age creeping up so unexpectedly. I knew I had been getting wobbly and had even ordered an exoskeleton to see if that would help.
Last year, I attended the Boston meeting, and that was a strain. This year, I thought that a meeting closer to home might work better. It turned out I underestimated the effect of desert air, or something, because it turned out to be a reach too far.
Unwelcome Attention
I can share with readers who have not yet crossed this threshold into frailty, that it can become the unwelcome center of attention. That’s something best avoided. It’s a mortifying experience, but everyone was very nice about it, and I’m more than grateful to one particular person who knows who she is. I don’t want to embarrass her, but the industry needs more executive directors like her.
Thanks
I hope to continue to share what I can, but it’s probably wise to stay closer to the CCRC where I live. I apologize to anyone whose session was disrupted. Thank you, Jeannie Parker Martin, Pat Girczyc, Paula Diggernes, Lola Rain, Anna Hall, and many more.
Life is a grand adventure. Enjoy every moment of it. And Shakespeare/Hamlet got it wrong. It turns out that we’re all frail in the end. Moreover, women usually outlive us men.
I think it’s terrific you are out there wanting to keep learning and having experiences.
Thank you, Janis. You’re very kind. Although people are living longer, healthier lives, age does eventually come to all. We need senior services that empower residents. Old people learning and contributing are not unusual. It’s what most people want unless and until they just give up and acquiesce.